I have always loved God and want to have a close relationship to God. However, I have been recently going through a lot of tough times financially this last year and a half. And have been asking God for finances to meet my needs, over and over. God did answer me and bless me many times. But as if God never showed the faithfulness before I still ask over and over . I noticed a lack of faith and more desperation on my part as I kept asking and asking in fear and doubt and being overwhelmed by the mountain of debt before me. I started to go down in anger and despair and depressed that I had no answers.
I mean what do you do, when the God you knew to bring answers and blessings seemed to stop? I began to go deeper and asked others of faith to pray for me, some answers popped up, but not the big answer. I began to get frustrated.
Later on one day, I was praying and asking God for my needs to be met. I said all the right things, I prayed the right way, but still no direct answers to my immediate problem. Not so…My problem was how I viewed God. It is a common and easy problem to get in. It happens ever so slowly. You start and get answers to your prayers and your excited and then over a period of time things slow down, the answers come slower. But what my problem really was, was simple.
One day praying, God audibly spoke to me(yes God does do that) and while I was praying to God over my needs, God spoke to me and says, “It’s nice to always be needed, but when are you going to want Me?”
Well with that question to me from God, I broke into a immediate current of tears and told God I am sorry, forgive me..Yes I want You. I over and over have been daily telling God I want You.
You see it is not our repetition of prayers that get God’s attention, but our desire to be close, to listen, to worship, to love, to want to be like God, that gets God’s attention.
So for me it has been a healing voice from God that has brought total freedom and makes me know just how much I am loved by God.
When I have a need, I simply ask and let it go and know that God heard it and will answer it, as Jesus said, Ask, and it shall be given to you, Seek and you will find, Knock and the door will be opened to you…It is a very simple principle of faith. But it’s our complicated mind and life of external influences that make it so difficult to receive from God our answers to our needs. Jesus said Ask=given, Seek=found, Knock=Opened. That is freedom and also to know that God wants you too!! As for me, I want You God !!!!!
Love you God, Your son Kelly
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